I don't even feel a need to actively mingle with people, I just make myself do it to not seem like a complete NEET.
but I always hate it.
I would much rather prefer just lying in my room listening to comfy music while i change my wallpaper to anime girl of the season.
how do you guys go about talking to others?
I spazzed out on that last line fml
everything i say has a string of possible consequences i have to think about. tell 1 person something and they may tell everyone they know, who might tell everyone they know, etc. tell 1 person something in a room of 10 people and it's 10 times worse
I assume most people do this but it is easier for some than others, and more unconscious. i definitely worry/plan more than most though
the worse part about this is thinking of the worst possible outcome and not doing anything at all fearing that the worst could happen.
sometimes I'm really envious of super extroverted and impulsive people
i alwasy think of the worst possible outcomes first but i plan to avoid them and i mostly do. i can be impulsive sometimes but i stopped because i cant stand myself
anxiety blows things out of proportion, but so does hope, just in the other direction. there are plenty of extroverted people who never consider the consequences of their actions and i would prefer to err on the side of caution than to become like them. that being said, the more i improve my social skills, the safer it is to engage socially.
yeah when i see someone else doing what i've done in the past and hate myself for it i start avoiding situations like social stuff
there are always exceptions, people that i am totally comfortable to be around, typically through a layer of anonymity. life isnt all bad
i wish i could help you anons, i don't have any friends but recently i don't feel anxiety around people or imagine the worst possible outcome anymore, only regular nerves and they disappear after a while.
i think most extroverted people try too hard to impress each other and don't realize it. it makes me avoid social stuff too
If I'm ever in the position where I have to talk to someone, I usually try to keep the conversation as distant as possible. Preset phrases, pop culture references, and recent news pieces are good enough to make it seem like you're not a freak. That's how I'd like it to go anyway, as soon as I'm next to someone anxiety takes over and my brain shuts down. I can't think of anything and if I do get something out its in a stuttery mess and I make myself look like a fool as usual.
No amount of talking to people has helped fix this either. I've been told I'd grow out of it or get used to it but I don't think that's the case with me.
how do you manage with stuff, like getting food or paying bills?
or do you still live with your parents?
can someone help me? is there any book or something that helped you guys?
Imageboard admins dont give a shit if trolls are fucking up their community. You should have learned that by now.
Not sure what the problem is: I work from home, and order everything to my doorstep.
My parents are dead and I have almost no interaction with people other than things like postmen, neighbors (a distant "hello") and the occasional cashier, when I manage to go to an actual grocery store.
Embedded programmer and hardware design.
I have some of the development devices at home, but most of the work environment can be simulated anyway, so I really just need computers to do my work.
However, there are unsuspected downsides to working at home all the time, but also work for a company, and now being self-employed.
Wow embedded people are getting rarer to find these days. I've only dabbled in a little bit of hw design, but things like timing issues and nondeterminism made me never want to touch anything below assembly level.
It took me forever to finish my degrees, because I didn't want to leave my house, also, since my parents died, I had to do plenty of utterly shitty jobs, which scarred me for life, on top of being already socially awkward.
I've graduated in 2011, and I've been employed for a couple years now, but all throughout my live, I had years where I was just doing nothing or the bare minimum just to pay rent, etc.
My parents were relatively poor, since they died, I inherited nothing. I only have my 1-bedroom apartment and that's it.
I hate going to work. I'm perfectly fine working from home on my own accords, but as I said in my previous post: working at home has its downsides. The company I work for simply assumes I sit down to work at around 8:00 and work till around 16:00. I wake up very early, usually around 5:00, take a walk and a breath of fresh air when nobody else is outside, and then do a bit of private shit. I sometimes like to lie down during the day for a couple hours, but given that all the other employees simply assume I'm at work I get calls all the time, asking for stuff, etc.
I can't simply tell them not to call me during work hours, etc. Just today I got a call at 7:50 because my co-worker assumed I'm already awake. I was actually looking through ebay, and wasn't really ready for work at all. If it was an office environment, I'd be either at my desk or not. I sometimes get calls at 18:00 or so, because people simply know I must be home, etc. and they simply think nothing of it.
I must log out of Teams and put my phone on Airplane mode while not working, otherwise I get bombarded with calls and messages.
So yeah, it's not like just because I work at home I can escape interactions like that.
You just described the dark side of bringing work home. My cousin's a manager, and he has to take calls even when he's with family.
Yes, however the same is true if you're self-employed or have a little company going. You're basically at work 24/7.
Granted, I don't have a family, I have literally no one. I leave my apartment around once a week to get groceries, in the mean time, I simply don't leave my apartment - there's simply no reason for it.
I'm 37 now, and I don't think I'll ever find a partner in life ever, it's just not feasible, also I don't really want it to begin with.
I had a relationship with a woman for 11 years, we lived together, etc. However we lived ourselves apart and we ended up sleeping at different times during the day, and the only interaction was fighting. I eventually terminated the apartment lease and moved to a small, one-bedroom apartment. This is where I live now.
I'm pretty much right back at where I was 15 years ago. I have income, but other than that, neither I have nor I even want interaction with anyone.